Leavin' On A Jet Plane

{pic from creativeeveryday.com}

Au revoir, mes amies!! I am packed and *almost* on my way to beautiful northern California to spend 3 glorious nights avec Ma Soeur, bro-in-law, and my darling niece Sofie (aka, the other maltipoo in our family). I plan on taking lots of pics and blogging regularly so stay tuned for our fun sisterly adventures (aka lots of eating & shopping!). I hope you all have a fabulous Memorial Day Weekend!!

P.S. this is my niece Sofie monster, anxiously awaiting my arrival (i come bearing treats of the expensive organic variety!). ain't she the cutest thing??

Fun Things!

After the depressing nature of my last few posts, i decided a lighthearted, pretty one full of fun things was definitely in order. Enjoy!

GO GREEN: First, if you're not already drinking your H2O out of a reusable bottle (sans BHP), then you need to jump on that bandwagon pronto! I have several varieties, but squealed with delight when City Girl blogged about Cafe Press's AWESOME customized SIGG bottles! Go here to design your own - you can even preview your SIGG in action ;) Check out City Girl's below!

PLANNER PAD FUN: Have you jumped on the Planner Pad bandwagon yet? I'll be the first to admit they're not much to look at, but they are AMAZING as far as planners are concerned. Not convinced? Check out Kimberly's fabulous planner pad podcast (featuring the lovely Julia!). Scroll down to podcast #143 - these ladies are planner pad fanatics!! I received a question from a dear reader about how to make these suckers more aesthetically pleasing. For moi, the easiest thing to use is scrapbook paper (if you can find the adhesive kind, even better!), glue, ribbons, and stickers. Below see (crappy) pics of my current PP covered in Amy Butler scrapbook paper and embellished with fun monogram stickers. I tie pink ribbons to the top of the spiral to use as bookmarks (you can see them peeking out the bottom of the 2nd pic). Sooooo easy!

Oooh bop, FASHION! No FUN post would be complete with some fashionable eye candy, n'est ce pas? Well since it's already been brutally hot in Austin (upper 90's a couple weeks ago - ick), i've decided summer is officially here to stay, despite the fact that it's still May. So, i've rounded up some of my fave swimwear for your viewing pleasure :)

One of these days i'm determined to get myself into a flattering bandeau top. In the meantime, i'll just dream about sporting this adorable one from J. Crew in this fabulous minty seafoam green. (P.S. Comes in TONS of colors!)




I LOVE striped suits (altho they're prob not v. flattering, huh?), and the retro chic style of this sweet two-piece from Anthropologie is calling my name... (of course i'd never respond until i looked like the model - ha!)



I'm beyond thrilled that one pieces have made such a fierce comeback! They're not just for old momma's anymore, girls. There are some adorable options out there that cover all manner of sins (and i'm not talking about the crazy sh*t Paris Hilton wears, ok?). I was immediately drawn to the sugary sweet pastels and ruffle mania of this Anthropologie number. If it weren't so darn expensive, i'd buy it in a heartbeat!



For more affordable options, always check out your local Tajay or Old Navy - they have great selection of bikinis for next to nothing. Also, Victoria's Secret is having a big sale on their swimwear as well, and if i remember correctly, they tend to get heavily marked down towards the end of the summer.

That's all for now... have a wonderful Thursday!!

P.S.

She makes me smile, even on my worst days.

A Petit Rant

If you're not in the mood to hear someone whining/complaining a little, please feel free to ignore this post. ;) There are just some things on my mind that i'd normally write in my journal, but knowing my readers, i feel that i could get some valuable feedback by blogging about it. So here i go!

Yesterday was a bad day (as it was for many of you, apparently). Aside from the bad drivers, pet mishaps, etc., i was really frustrated at work, which guarantees a bad day, n'est ce pas? As if i don't question enough what the heck i'm doing here, my attitude towards work worsens exponentially when i don't have enough work to do. In theory, not having much to do sounds great. I can roll in around 9 and leave as early as 5:30. I don't have to work weekends or evenings, and i'm pretty certain i won't get a frantic email at 6 a.m. on a Saturday morning. The problem with being an attorney and having no work is that your productivity/success is measured on the number of hours you bill.

Ladies and gentlemen, allow moi to introduce you to the billable hour. We. Hate. It. (at least the the lawyers i know do) Evaluating your day in terms of billable hours can wreak havoc on the mind and soul, esp. when that number is low, or oftentimes, zero. Your value to the firm is how much you can bill the client - money, no matter where you are, is the bottom line. And unfortunately in this economy and in the particular practice area I'm in, business is slow. Being a new associate makes things way more stressful, especially when you read abovethelaw.com and hear about new layoffs almost daily (thankfully, that seems to have slowed down as well). I'm done (for the most part) worrying about being laid off. There was a period i was literally sick with fear every day i came into the office. I emailed City Girl almost daily with new fears/concerns, and she was WONDERFUL about addressing them and getting me to see the big picture (merci beaucoup, City Girl!!). What will i accomplish by making myself sick with worry? If i get laid off, so be it. I can't control the future, and i can only focus on doing the best i can do right now. Right?

This brings me to my current "problem". I'm trying to do the best i can do right now, but it's not enough. And furthermore, i can't bring in my own work which means i'm completely dependent on those senior to me to give me work to do, the hours to bill. It's a difficult balance - being diligent about finding work while also not be the nagging/annoying associate. Everyone is worried about hours, and since there aren't many to go around, being last on the totem pole is a disadvantage. Well yesterday i was faced with Day #3 of absolutely no billable work to do and starting to get really resentful of not being given anything to do despite my constant requests.

Because here's the deal guys, i know i have to PROVE myself. But how can i do that when it's impossible for me to work hard?? I know this may be hard for many to believe, but I ACTUALLY WANT TO WORK HARD. Because THIS is the time to do it! But i can't! And it's not my fault (for the first time in my life). And the thing is, i DO go above and beyond to try and work hard. I answer every email requesting an associate to do a project, i respond to partners who email on Friday afternoons for someone to work on something over the weekend, i try to do everything i can so that i can bill bill bill. It's not enough though. And i'm frustrated. Because not only do i feel worthless, but i feel like people don't see me for what i am - someone who's actually making a serious effort to work hard.

So, of course, that leads me into a downward spiral of "what the hell am i doing here" and "this is so not the right career for me" and "god could this day go by any slower" and "someone put me out of my misery". Now, don't get me wrong, i'm still me. I don't want to be put on projects that'll keep me in the office until 3 a.m.. What i do want is an opportunity to show my employers that i am capable of being a great associate* (and ok, maybe that will eventually involve some late nights, and that's fine). And more than that, i guess i want to feel like i am actually a valuable player in this whole game and that i'm not wasting my days on the internet FREAKING OUT about the number of hours i'm not billing. (Oh billable hour, how i loathe you.)

Ok, i'm done.


*Well, not quite. I have to say that I have been lucky enough to have been given a great deal of responsibility for a first-year associate, and i have been given great praise. I have been appreciated for the times i stepped up to the plate to do unpleasant tasks. And i know my own partner is happy with me. So okay, not all is awful, but if things keep up the way they do, they could quickly turn that way.

Cranky

I've had a rough start today. You know those days when it seems like the world is fighting you, and you're like, UM HELLO, STOP FIGHTING ME, WORLD!! Especially since i *finally* woke up and got my bum into the gym for some cardio. (It's been weeks... ok maybe months...) What a great start to my Tuesday, i foolishly thought. Since then it's been destructive pets, spills, breaks, lame Austin drivers, Central Market NOT having sushi ready this morning (got a salmon salad instead - boo), and another day at work filled with... oh, that's right, NOTHING. Also? I'm exhausted and want nothing more than to crawl back into bed. I thought exercise was supposed to give you energy?

Luckily one of the first blogs i read once i got to work was Yogadiva's Divine Life, and her post entitled "Beyond Happy." I wish i were a more positive person because i know i'd be happier. Unfortunately i tend to sway towards the negative/bitchy side, and that's something i'd really like to change. My intentional/goal for the week (written in my Planner Pad in hot pink!) was to remember that i have power over my thoughts and can work to change them. I can't control whether someone cuts me off, or if the cleaning company i hired did a completely half-assed job, but i can control how i react to such situations. So yes, it's a neverending process, but i'm working on it. Thanks for reminding me, Yogadiva! I hope to be as positive and happy as you one day. :)

And in the spirit of this post, here are 5 things for which i'm grateful right now:

1. My health
2. My awesome sister whom i'm fortunate enough to be visiting this Memorial Day Weekend
3. My awesome blogging/twitter friends!!
4. Iced blueberry green tea (elixir of the GODDESSES, i've decided)
5. Yoga

Have a GREAT Tuesday, y'all!

Happy Monday!

A few things catching my eye lately...

1. This sweet wedding. i love the vintage touches, and i am REALLY loving her short flouncy dress with those shoes!! {All picstures from www.stylemepretty.com}



2. The Dalai Lama and Karl Lagerfeld on Twitter!

3. This interesting New York Times article on yoga for bigger bodies.



I haven't decided how i feel about it... but i think it's a great idea in theory to create a safe space for those who are uncomfortable practicing with a bunch of tiny peeps. I'm always the fattest girl in the studio, and lemme tell ya, it does not do good things for my self-esteem. But i've learned to turn inward and ignore everyone else, and i'm usually feeling pretty good by the end of class. (P.S. I've made it to FOUR yoga classes in the past week and a half!)

4. PINK moleskin notebooks!! i thought they were a myth, but finally spotted them at my local Borders (and apparently you can get them from Barnes & Noble online). HOLLA!! You'll never find me scribbling in boring black again ;)



5. The idea of creating a 30-Before-30 List. i first read about it on Lauren's fabulous blog and have since skipped to Suz's blog to get more info. As i approach my 26th birthday (August 11!) i'm thinking this is a WONDERFUL idea. I love goals and making lists so why not?

What's catching your eye lately?

i can see the light

Bonjour, mes amies! TGIF, n'est ce pas? This week has dragged by for moi...

Last night i had one too many glasses of vin and biere (is this the French word for beer?) and may have spiraled into a mini depression/panicfest about my life. You know, the is this really what i'm doing with my life/i'm wasting my youth/will i ever be happy/i want to be fulfilled kind of crisis that all 20-somethings go through at least once. (i seem to go through it much more often than that...) Woke up this morning feeling pretty low, but my day has quickly improved. Had lunch with a dear colleague (one whom i decidedly could not work here without), caught up on some tweets/blogs, and am basking in the knowledge that today is finally FRIDAY!!

Even more exciting is that i have nothing scheduled for tonight. Absolutely NADA. This week has been filled with evening engagements (fun! but exhausting) and next week is even busier! So tonight i am happy to go home and do whatever the heck i want.

Well... actually i have a lot to do. The cleaning crew is coming over tomorrow to deep clean my apartment (with GREEN products), and i want to go through every cabinet/pantry/box/etc. before then. My fruit/dry fly situation is still under debate (maintenance did something yesterday that seemed to help, but i'm not convinced it's a permanent fix), so i'm also going through the apt in order to eliminate any other possibilities. Still i plan on making tonight as fun as possible - breaking open a bottle of bubbly, dancing to Britney Spears, playing visually stimulating movies like Marie Antoinette, noshing on healthy eats, and of course, spending quality time with my darling Lola.

Saturday night i've plans with a friend to (finally) watch Slumdog Millionaire. It's been sitting on my console for weeks! Our menu for the evening includes: fresh guacamole, tex-mex queso (aka velveeta + rotel, gross i know but it tastes goooood), white wine sangria with oodles of fresh citrus and berries, roasted veggies (b/c we need some sort of healthy item in here), and something tasty for dessert (haven't figured out what. any suggestions??).

Oh - i also hope to crack open Jen Lancaster's latest - Pretty In Plaid.

What're your fabulous plans for le weekend?

P.S. Want to learn how to say "pink" in French? Head on over to a la Parisienne for today's French lesson!