Sunday, February 5, 2012

Book Review: MWF Seeking BFF

I'm writing this book review, and I'm not even done with the book - that's how much I dig it. MWF Seeking BFF: My Yearlong Search for a New BFF is nonfiction gold for 20-/30-something women who love having girlfriends. Don't believe me? Read below.

"When Rachel Bertsche first moves to Chicago, she’s thrilled to finally share a zip code, let alone an apartment, with her boyfriend. But shortly after getting married, Bertsche realizes that her new life is missing one thing: friends. Sure, she has plenty of BFFs—in New York and San Francisco and Boston and Washington, D.C. Still, in her adopted hometown, there’s no one to call at the last minute for girl talk over brunch or a reality-TV marathon over a bottle of wine. Taking matters into her own hands, Bertsche develops a plan: She’ll go on fifty-two friend-dates, one per week for a year, in hopes of meeting her new Best Friend Forever.

In her thought-provoking, uproarious memoir, Bertsche blends the story of her girl-dates (whom she meets everywhere from improv class to friend rental websites) with the latest social research to examine how difficult—and hilariously awkward—it is to make new friends as an adult. In a time when women will happily announce they need a man but are embarrassed to admit they need a BFF, Bertsche uncovers the reality that no matter how great your love life is, you’ve gotta have friends."

I bought this book on my kindle (my first actual kindle purchase!!) last week before I hopped on a plane to New Orleans for my law school bestie's, Pony's, wedding. After reading about it in several magazines, I knew I had to get my hands on it. After all, I know exactly how Rachel feels/felt. After law school, I found myself in an ah-mazing city (Austin - duh) lacking in the true friendship department. I had my other law school girl bestie, Jenny, and I had a couple of other friends I'd see semi-regularly. But the rest of the time, I found myself canceling plans with so-so friends with whom I felt little to no real connection. Quite frankly, I would have rather stayed home with Lola. So that's what I did.

Fast forward one year and a half, and I was not happy. I found myself constantly finding reasons to leave Austin, whether for the weekend or just the day, and sooner or later I found myself craving a different life altogether. Hello, NYC

Now my life is a series of social commitments, and I can hardly keep up. Reading this book, I find myself paying a lot more attention to my social calendar. Take yesterday, for example:

11:30 a.m. - Coffee shop catch-up avec my boys (Will and David) @ Grounded

2:00 p.m. - Brunch avec old boss/dear friend Megan @ Five Points

6:00 p.m. - Art journaling play date avec new friend/fellow art journaling enthusiast Tiffani @ her incredibly decorated apartment (more on this later - I am INSPIRED, y'all!) Psst - I was introduced to Tiffani via Valerie, another blog-y friend. Merci, Val!

In between was catching up with my roomie, another unexpected dear amie Annika. By the end of the day (around 12:30 a.m.), I realized I had been talking for about 12 hours straight. Phew! I was exhausted, but also feeling quite accomplished. All my conversations had been by choice, AND, more importantly, deeply satisfying on many levels. Throughout the course of the day, I had discussed, in no particular order: politics, interior design, goal-setting, boys, boys and more boys, hair color, fashion, self-confidence and affirmations, food... the list goes on and on. I wanted to whip out my iPhone and text Rachel about my successful day (that is, until I realized, we're not BFF's in real life - such a shame).

That is yet another reason I enjoy this book - because Rachel is totally and completely the kind of BFF I would want, so I can relate to her wants/needs/desires when it comes to bestfriendship. 

I highly recommend this book. It's funny, it's endearing, but it's also wicked smart and insightful. What more can you ask for from a BFF?

P.S. Also? I'm feeling so ridiculously, stupidly, blissfully grateful for the friendships in my life. How did I get so lucky? Note to self: Be a better friend in 2012.



Lauren said...

I saw this book in the Oprah mag last month (I think) and had it on my Amazon wishlist. You inspired me to actually get it! Thanks for posting about it!

Katz NYC said...

Sounds like a book I need to get! When I first moved here all the way from Finland I took a while before I made any friends. My husband suggested Craigslist (back then it was still ok) and I met one wonderful girl who we had sooo much in common and became instant besties. But then she moved to Cali and I was on the lookout for new friend again. Whom I met at work. But I still feel like i don't have anyone I can call my bff, although there are two friends that are very dear and close to me. Maybe that's all I need at this age.