Monday, June 14, 2010

Day 12... Happy

(Pic from dinner Saturday night. Roomie Deux is on the right of moi and Roomie Trois is on the left!)

Today was one of those amazing lazy free flow days that begins with a brunch date in Tribeca and ends with a Tony's viewing party on Wall Street (how lame was Catherine Zeta Jones' speech btw??). Mix in a rainy stroll through SoHo, a couple watermelon martinis, and loads of fun new friends, and you've got yourself the perfect Sunday.

Yes, tonight I'm happy to be in NYC. It's not always easy though, and I'm not going to lie and pretend my life here is nothing but brunches, shopping and cocktails (although yes, lately, it seems that way). I miss Lola daily, I cry daily, I've never felt so far away from my family, and sometimes I stop and ask myself, "What the hell am I doing?" With no clear idea of what's coming ahead, I'm both excited and scared out of my mind. I've never not had a plan... it's terrifying. Also? I'm broke. Well, I'm going to be broke fairly soon, and the reality of that, my friends, is very very much freaking me out.

But I'm so grateful that you're here, and that I can come here after good days and after bad days and know that you'll be here to listen. Thank you. I love you. (Come visit!)

4 comments:

KitKat AKA Katz said...

I feel you. First time I moved here I knew no-one, but at least I had a job and a place to stay, so I knew friends would find me and I would find them. I left everyone in Finland behind, a boyfriend, all my dear old friends and my family (including my German Shepherd babygirl). I felt so sick to my stomach for doing that and cursed myself for not staying home and cursed the urge that I always had to travel and leave.

But I'm happy with the decisions I made and they've made me who I am today and got me where I am today. I still hate my job and am very unhappy that I haven't been able to change that one thing after all this time, but I know soon things will change.

Cheer up girl, you WILL be fine!

ellen said...

Just curious: are you doing yoga? and are you done with law? Just asking since those are two things I'm always kinda on'n'off with so I wondered what you were doing on those fronts. So happy that your move has been a good one so far . . . and joining you in missing Austin, such a great town!!

Carolyn said...

Katz - Thank you so much!! That makes me feel a LOT better.

Ellen - I'm not doing yoga right now, and yes, I am DONE with law. I plan to get back to yoga soon though!!

MoneyMaus said...

Glad you are HAPPY! It's the little things you need to focus on now, instead of the big (sometimes scary) picture... but I can tell you are such a New Yorker at heart! Enjoy :)