Monday, March 30, 2009
Finding Balance and... Poop.
Remember that scene in Season 6 of Sex and the City where Carrie is roaming the streets of Paris alone (b/c that jerk deserted her once again!) and steps into a pile of horse poop while wearing some adorable Louboutins? Replace "horse" with "dog" and "adorable Louboutins" with "NOTHING" and voila - welcome to my life. Oui, early this morning, around 5 a.m. or so, still 95% asleep, i stumbled my way into the bathroom. On my way my foot lands on something soft, wet, and squishy. Whaa? I thought maybe the cat had dragged something out of the trash or what have you. I flip on the light and through my very hazy eyes (terrible vision), what do i see? Poop. A LOT of poop. All over my bathroom floor and now all over my feet. Disgusted doesn't even begin to describe what i was feeling.
A bit of background info: My precious pup Lola has recently become a very picky eater. Where she once inhaled her kibble, she now ignores it unless i do something to make it more appetizing. That used to be mixing in a tablespoon of wet food. This past weekend she decided that wasn't enough so I resorted to mixing the kibble/wet food combo with warm water. And putting a treat on top. That seemed to do the trick - hurray! Except, apparently that combo makes for some untimely bowel movements (any dog owner has her dog's poop schedule down cold so accidents are few and far between). Hence this morning's "incident". (Btw i would happily just let her starve because i know eventually she'll eat whatever is given to her, but the problem with that is she will throw up bile, and while bile is not as disgusting as poop, it's still unpleasant.)
After 3 floor cleanings (@ 5 a.m. mind you) and about 8 scalding-water-foot-scrubs, i retreated to bed only to wake up 2 hours later. Gross. I'm still nauseous from the whole thing and will probably proceed to mop my entire apartment twice when i get home. *Shudders* It's a good thing she's so darn cute and lovable...
In other news, after yoga yesterday i found myself spending some time reflecting and just being. I came upon the unfortunate realization that i've sort of lost touch with that self-reflective/soul-searching/meditative/mindful part of myself recently. It's no coincidence that my journal hasn't been touched in weeks, and my mind-body connection is all whack. I need to get back to that place. I decided it might be a good time to re-read Elizabeth Gilbert's Eat Pray Love. Love it or hate it, this book has undeniably impacted a number of lives, mine included. I actually own the book on CD (read by the author) and decided to pop it in first thing in the morning on my drive to work. In addition to listening to Ms. Gilbert's soothing voice, I am also planning to clean up my diet (no diet sodas, limited sugar in general, more grains and greens), get back in tune with my body (more yoga, regular exercise, long walks w/ the aforementioned pooptastic dog), spend more time reflecting (journaling, praying, meditating), and indulging my creative but not-so-spendy side (DIY projects, reading & writing). I hate that i'm the all-or-nothing type. I tend to get... obsessive about stuff. I can be so many Carolyn's, into so many different things, and i know it's frustrating for my family and entertaining/ridiculous to my friends. I truly believe I CAN be all those versions of myself, but in moderation. Moderation... that word has never seemed to jive well with my personality. But there has to be some sort of achievable, healthy balance that won't force me to sacrifice what makes me ME... right?